Girls Gone Wild
I had been living with my best friend Colleen for about six months. The only problem was that she was a heavy drinker and I only drank from time to time. She would have loud parties, but usually only while I was at work, so it never really bothered me too much. And she always cleaned up after herself.
This night though, was different. I worked as a waitress and on this Friday I had just finished up working a 13 hour shift. I arrived home around 3AM to a crowd of people in my house. One of her friends turned around and saw me come in and exclaimed a loud hello in her excitement to see me. Colleen was around the corner and when she heard my name she was so startled she jumped up and spilled her beer on the counter top. She ran out of the kitchen and flew past me down the hall to where our bedrooms were. She started knocking on my bedroom door.
“Get out of the room guys. Â Come on guys, get out the room,” she said.
Slowly, I headed down the hall. I was tired and not in the mood to make a scene in front of all of her drunk friends. Quietly, I asked her what was going on and who was in my room. I tried the door, but it was locked. I could feel my face getting hot. Now I was mad. I started banging on my bedroom door.
“Get out of my room, right now!” I screamed.
After about 30 seconds I could hear someone very quietly respond that they couldn’t find their shoes. After about a minute and a half of fumbling with the lock and young woman emerged from my bedroom with her supposed boyfriend. I had never seen either one of them before in my life. They came right out of my room and went straight into Colleen’s room which, of course, was unoccupied. The girl sat on the bed and started to cry.
I went in my room and plugged the light back in which had somehow gotten knocked out of the wall and changed out of my work clothes. Then I got to the rest of the party guests. I told them all rather loudly to please get out of my home because I worked a long day and wanted some peace and quiet. Â I let one person stay but only because she was way to drunk to drive. After everyone had gone I just stared at Colleen for a minute. After thinking about it for a few minutes I decided I would go stay at my boyfriends for the night.
“You just kicked all my friends out and now you’re leaving?” she asked in a cocky way.
“Yes, Colleen, I’m leaving. Â And I kicked them all out because I wanted to make sure no one else would be having sex in my bed while I’m not here,” I said.
The next day she offered no apology. She blamed everything on the fact that she was too drunk and barely remembered anything. She also had no explanation as to why they were using my room and not hers. My replacement roommate was one of my male friends. And I still swear that living with a guy is always 100 times easier than living with another female.
Damn, that’s terrible! I came home late one night to an unexpected party (and I had to work the next morning), but I never had any strangers having sex in my bed. Ew!
Yeah, it’s the random strangers having sex in your bed that creeps me out the most. Ew.
(Not all female roommates are drama queens, though!)
It’s not easier to live with males who don’t clean up after themselves because “momma always did it”! Trust me, both sexes have stereotypes that are true to the T.
I definitely feel your pain here, but I hope there is a lesson in the OP for this — talk about issues before they become an issue. You didn’t mind the partying, so when she took it to the next level (there’s a background story to the two sleeping in your room we don’t have all the details for), you got pissed. This is a lesson for all of us, really… set the ground rules and don’t “just deal” with things that can turn messier because they will. :/
I imagine that the worst part of this would be the realization that you’ve most likely slept in a bed that has been secretly sexed on many, many times before this. My apologies
I would have throttled her if I were you. Damn, what an awful experience!
I would have been really pissed about the people in my bed, but I can’t imagine actually kicking all of my roommate’s friends out of the house. I mean, you’re not her mom; you’re her roommate. Get the nasty people out of your bed, and if it’s really bad, make your roommate buy you a new duvet or something, but demanding that everyone go home from a party on a Friday night? Unless you two had some kind of understanding about visitors and parties–which all roommates should have–your roommate didn’t break any “rules” by having people over. I’m sure it was annoying. I’ve lived with some crazy drunks and drug addicts in my life. But that’s what ear plugs and month-to-month leases are for.
Ok, if you leave out the part with other people sleeping in the bed, I would say you were the bad roommate in this situation.
You said yourself that she usually had parties when you weren’t there and cleaned up after herself. So you get home, kick everyone out and then decide to go to your boyfriends house? I would be annoyed with you too.
Just wash your sheets, get a lock for your door and get over it.
male or female…the worst are party types who just want to drink their faces off every night with a cast of thousands.
RE: Mari
Take your own advice and get over yourself. Same goes for “GarterSnake”
When you come home from work at 3 AM it’s not too much to ask to come home to a house where you can sleep in your own bed. People fucking in her bed aside, the lock obviously wasn’t keeping creepy people out. I wouldn’t want to sleep in a house full of drunken strangers. Just because some people are used to living with scummy drunkards and drug addicts doesn’t mean that’s an acceptable norm for the rest of us.
The OP said that Colleen was her best friend. She knew that Colleen liked to drink and have parties, and still, she chose to live with her.
So yes, it IS too much to ask that the roommate suddenly change and stop having parties just because the OP works late. I addressed the fact that it’s disgusting that people were in her bed. So did Mari. My point–and Mari’s, I think–is that the rest of it, kicking everyone out of the house as if she were Colleen’s parent, is overboard.
It sounds like the lock on the OP’s door was the kind that locks from the inside. The people using her room locked it, and that’s why the OP couldn’t get in.
If living with “scummy drunkards and drug addicts” isn’t your cup of tea, then don’t live with them. But the OP chose to live with someone who liked to party. If, to you, it’s reasonable to expect to come home to a quiet place after work every night, then you should probably live alone, or with a nun.
I agree with Gartersnake and Mari. That was a pretty terrible thing to do, but the OP overreacted. She not only kicked everyone out, but it sounds like she kicked the roomie out eventually as well. The roommate obviously respected the OPs schedule and wishes most of the time by cleaning up, so going insane over a (admittedly large) misstep is not really fair. Sure, be pissed and kick everyone out while you are pissed, but end a relationship with your best friend? Just wash the damn sheets.
She wasn’t kicking them out of the house as her roommate’s parent, she was kicking them out of the house as a hardworking person who happened to live there and help pay the bills. She wants to party at 3 AM, go do it at a club.
Way to just ignore the majority of what I said, especially the stuff about the OP choosing to live with someone she knew liked to party.
Oh, and the roommate helped pay the bills, too. Anyone who pays rent has some say on what goes on in the house. If you don’t like that, then don’t have a roommate. Really, I hope and pray you don’t have a roommate.
Damn, you guys really go after each other.
In this story what really would have set me off was being locked out of my OWN room. I think I would have tried to break in.
wow, anyone fucks on my bed, without me gets kicked in the god damn face. And any reacting I do to the people in a house that’s partly mine is justified, because my bed is full of semen and vaginal fluids. You might think she over reacted, I think it just says what you are willing to put up with. Being locked out of MY room? Better hope there is no drill around for me to take the door off the hinges. Maybe this is because I have never, nor will ever have a room mate that I’m not involved romantically with, and the thought of strangers with my stuff sends chills down my spine.
I hate when people boil down difficulties they’v experienced with others down to sex/gender.
It’s not b/c she was female that you had a hard time with her.