Liar, Liar
My freshman year of college I was assigned a random roommate, but I figured it couldn’t be too bad. From day one she pronounced my (very common) first name wrong, spread out her huge collection of clothes all over our very small dorm room and never cleaned up after herself. This girl would bring leftovers home, leave them to rot in our mini-fridge for weeks and then proceed to eat them (mold and all) when I or anyone else confronted her about the food. If I went to bed first she would then go to sleep with her music still blaring and all the lights on, until I got up and turned everything off. She also had a delightful habit of bringing strangers back to the room in the middle of the night, all of them drunk and then invite them to sit on my bed, with me still in it, trying in vain to sleep. She screamed at everyone, spent a large amount of time whining on the phone to her parents asking for money, lied left and right and enjoyed burping loudly and then laughing hysterically.
The awful living arrangement cumulated towards the end of the year when she invited a boy over to our room at midnight on a weeknight. I was already half-asleep in bed, but volunteered to leave to give them privacy, but she refused multiple times, saying her and the boy were just friends and he was just coming over talk for a few minutes. Fine. I put my iPod in and fell asleep. I later awoke to hear some graphic foreplay complete with verbal instruction (keep in mind our beds were less than four feet apart). I promptly jumped out of bed and got the hell out of there, camping up in my friend’s room down the hall. A few minutes later, in storms my roommate (the rooms were connected) to make a speech about how sorry she was that the boy had done that to us. Us? She sure wasn’t complaining a minute ago! The next day she sent me a multitude of “I’m sorry” texts, again putting all the blame on the guy and never talked to me in person. We ignored each other the remainder of the semester, which thankfully, wasn’t long.
Did you ever confront her about her behaviour? Sounds like she pegged you for a doormat and walked all over you, escalating each incident.
ewww who eats mold?!?!?
maybe she thought the mold had penicillin in it and was good for her.
Hooray, not another two-parter!
The idea of someone having sex while I’m trying to sleep mere feet away grosses me out so damn bad. It’d be less rude just to wake the person up and bluntly say “We’re going to have sex, go somewhere else.”
I find it interesting how in these stories no one ever demands to be moved. As much money as everyone is spending, I think it’s well within your rights. When I lived with that uber-conservative Rachel McAdams hater who I posted about around Thanksgiving, I had a refuge at my dad’s place. But when I lived with the giant last semester (I haven’t posted that one yet) I complained & threatened to leave & guess what? They miraculously found me a place to go when before they said there wasn’t any.
I have found once you threaten to withdraw a lot of money, you can get shit done. It’s not ideal or even necessarily mature, but when it’s basically the only card you have you make it work.
@Andrew – I didn’t “demand to be moved” for a few reasons. 1) There would have been nowhere to move TO – the university had underestimated the amount of housing they would need for that year and I was already forced to upperclassmen housing as it was. 2) I was on full scholarship, including housing, so me threatening to withdraw “my” money would actually just make THEM money. 3) If the last horrible event had happened earlier in the year, I probably would have moved, but since there was only a few weeks left it really wouldn’t have been worth the trouble at that point.
@ijoju – Wow! Thanks for calling me a doormat! Haven’t you ever met someone who was so obnoxious no amount of confrontation/negotiation got through to them? Remind me never to live with YOU!
OP, you only mentioned that you confronted her over the rotten food. You listed a bunch of horrible stuff she did but not any retaliation. She clearly didn’t respect you from the beginning but you never seemed to do anything about it. She escalated to the point of getting people to sit on you! You didn’t say you did anything until she had sex across from you.
From what you’ve laid out, you weren’t a very confrontational person until this nightmare roommate. She saw that in you, took advantage and you let her.
So I wasn’t very confrontational person, so what? That doesn’t mean I deserved a roommate who took advantage of that. I was 18, moving from a small rural town to a rich school in a big city and this girl embodied the worst of it. I did normal-people things like ask nicely and stay out of her way. I didn’t want to be passive aggressive and I didn’t want her to get too angry with me because I saw the way she acted when she was angry with others and it wasn’t pretty. As far as I’m concerned her behavior was not in any way “my fault” or my fault for “letting her”, because a normal roommate wouldn’t do stuff like that in the first place. I’d appreciate it if you’d stop insulting me.
What is the OP supposed to do? Piss in her coffee? Her roommate’s behavior was not the OPs fault.
Yeah, I’m with the OP on this one.
Sometimes, some roommates are so shitty that no amount of confrontation will help. Not polite requests, not passive aggression, not yelling, nothing. In fact, they may get spiteful and just act worse. I know it’s hard to believe that there are people out there that immature, but it’s true. I have a roommate like that right now, it’s super aggravating.
“ewww who eats mold?!?!?”
Stilton is lovely on crackers.
@OP – You think you feel bad, imagine how he feels. Unless I’m a crazy-mad person projecting, I think I know the type; she did the flirtatious friends thing, she engineered a liaison and then after she passes it off as something entirely his idea because she’d be to innocent for that sort of thing (or something). People like that just live to generate drama, you’re much better off shy of her.
was there any kind of RA or student advocate in your dorm? in mine we had an upperdivision RA that was there to help all the residents including with roommate problems. i srsly wouldve gotten an outside party involved after the strangers sitting on your bed bit, isnt that a personal safety issue?
dang sweet story man.