This really seems pretty incredibly insensitive. I don’t really think medical issues constitute a MVWR, it just makes you seem petty and mean.

Would the OP rather she not breathe? I also think this is pretty insensitive. There were two annoying things that the lady from Texas did that she could’ve not done, turning up the stereo (she could’ve either kept her hearing aids in or maybe used headphones or something) and not getting the difference between Celsius and Fahrenheit, but the other things are medical issues that can’t really be helped. (I’m not going to get in the whole “IT’S HER FAULT SHE’S FAT OMG LAWL” thing because the cause of her being overweight isn’t relevant to this particular discussion. And you know somebody’s going to bring it up. It’s practically law.) It doesn’t really seem the OP was really that concerned with her roommate’s well-being.

Wow, lighten up. She wasn’t mean or snarky about it.

Being overweight is relevant. When you are overweight you get sleep apnea, and have to use that awful loud ass machine. And the machine kept them all awake. Lose weight, no machine. Of course there are people that are thin that have apnea. Not many. Before you jump on my ass for “bashing fat people” Yeah, I was a FAT ass. I had sleep issues. Now I’m thin, no sleep apnea, no trouble climbing stairs…I agree with Margaret. Lighten up, you are on a web site to read about others misfortunes ya know, you can jump off the high horse…

I don’t think this is insensitive, the OP mentioned that she didn’t want the roommate to feel badly, but I can imagine it’s still a pain in the arse to have someone play loud music (headphones, hello?) or burst in on you on the toilet or in the shower with great regularity.

As a fatass I think people like ‘rawr’ are greatly overreacting, we don’t need your white knighting ktnx. Personally I find it more insulting that someone thinks they need to defend fat people against people who have a genuine concern for someone’s health. We’re fat, not stupid or helpless.

White knighting, eh? Hm, I suppose I’ll have to take your word for it. I also didn’t realize I said or implied that fat people were stupid or helpless, but, once again, I’ll just take your word for it.

But, as we all know, the internet is SERIOUS BUSINESS. It’s my job to be a humorless dick OMG LAWL.

Her weight has absolutely nothing to do with the story. Sleep Apnea is a breathing problem, being overweight might’ve had something to do with it but being overweight doesn’t actually cause it.

As a young, otherwise-healthy, hearing impaired woman who wears hearing aids, I challenge the submitter to be more considerate. While one’s inability to hear your voice through a closed door may be a slight inconvenience to you, imagine a life where everyone on the other side of the door is constantly frustrated with you.

I had sleep apnea due to my tonsils. I probably still snore but since I had them removed two summers ago, it’s a lot better. I AM overweight but in my case, it wasn’t due to that. I can see where someone could read the insensitivity into it but couldn’t they have politely asked her to keep her hearing aids in or ask about the headphones? I know I would have had problems with the Fahrenheit to Celsius thing myself.

Thankyou Rawr. It’s good to know that there’s someone there who at least recognises that there are different reasons for weight gains, and doesn’t automatically assume many things. She may not have been able to lose the weight (like myself) due to medical reasons, and I don’t think that anyone should judge overweight people without knowing the full medical and psychological background of each case. Some people don’t mind mention of their weight, others are constantly aware of it and the telling looks from other people and snarky comments simply make us miserable.

well she sounds like all her problems made her hard to live with but aside from barging in she doesn’t sound like a terrible person. I am sure it would drive me nuts after a while, but considering that I’ve had a drug addict, an anti-semite and a deadbeat who wouldn’t pay bills, she doesn’t sound that bad.

Ledi – “I don’t think that anyone should judge overweight people without knowing the full medical and psychological background of each case. ”

Is this just for overweight people, or all people, including those with eating disorders , social anxieties, or any other issue that isn’t apparent. I think your statement is one-sided. Either we can judge and accept that we are wrong or we shouldn’t judge at all, because then we might have to admit we are wrong.

I’ll rewrite your statement as “I don’t think that anyone should judge anyone without getting to know them first.”

As if that will ever happen

I don’t understand why the door had to be left unlocked all the time (was there a lock?). I would just say, get a lock and change the rule. But I’d definitely find someone bursting in on me all the time annoying. I mean, why even knock if you know you can’t hear the reply? Might as well just barge in right?

I once almost had a VRW situation, when I was changing to a new room in my college dorm. I moved all my bags in, and then met my new roommate. I have no idea what exactly what all her ailments were, but she seemed to have every illness on the planet, as well as a broken leg. I felt absolutely terrible for her, since her health problems were so numerous, but the more she kept describing to me (and, if physically noticeable, actually showing me) all her problems, the more uneasy I became, knowing I’d have to share this tiny (messy) room with her. I finally knew I could not deal with it once she gestured toward the bathroom and advised me that it would be best if I washed the tub down with bleach every morning before taking a shower. Later that day when she wasn’t there, I moved my still unpacked bags back out and spoke with the housing people to get myself moved to a different room.

I felt so bad for this girl, and I most definitely did not want to offend her, but I just could not see myself comfortably rooming with her. I present my story to show I understand the OP’s situation; it’s not easy to live with a roommate who has many physical issues.

Just have to say – my husband has sleep apnea and wears one of those machines. I sleep right next to him every night, and they are NOT that loud. Seriously. Can you also not sleep when there’s a fan going or a cricket chirping? Maybe you should have invested in earplugs yourself if it really bothered you that much.

My FIL has sleep apnoea and uses a CPAP machine. They’re not loud at all, certainly not as loud as my white noise masker for my tinnitus! Now it looks like hubby has apnoea it too, and they’re both very, very slender people. Being overweight is not causal to anything, really. Being inactive, leading an unhealthy life style, eating crap food, and not taking care of yourself…well, that’s what’ll do it.

Still, it sounds like it was close quarters in that flat, and anything physically askew can really, really wear on you. I get where the OP is coming from, but honestly, it could’ve been worse.

They probably could have done a little problem solving to make the situation better. Like put a sign outside the bathroom door that would let you choose different things like: In the shower, Be out in a minute, or Open. Then put a conversion chart on the oven. But there ya go. Figure that all of these people were also immersed in a different culture and kind of needed home to be a bit more of a comfortable sanctuary instead of a place where this girl’s wheezing like she’s going to croak at any minute, stinking the place up with burned crap, barging in on you when you’re trying to have a private moment in the bathroom, and running a CPAP all night (keep in mind that we don’t know how old this story was – modern CPAPs may be super quiet but hers may have been old, junky, and loud).

I read MVWR because it makes me laugh and reminds me that the roommate I have is not so bad, though he considers me hard to talk to and I end up doing all of the cleaning as though I’m his mother. This story just makes me sad

“First of all, she was overweight, and always came up to our fifth floor huffing and puffing. We were worried for her health.”

Yes, I’m sure you spent many nights laying awake worrying about her health, which is obviously why you would feel the need to mention her weight.