A Dorm Double
My school assigned random roommates and revealed them on move-in day.
“Carrie” only drank Vanilla Coke and ate Rice-A-Roni. Twelve cans, three meals a day. Every day for eight months. She had a phobia of fruit flies, so she rarely left her room. She was a musical theater major with a weak voice and an inability to read music. Every time I colored my hair, she dyed hers to match. Brown to red to purple to black, and she never missed a beat. Her ultra-conservative views didn’t bother me, except when she tried to convert me to her cultish religion because I was doomed to burn in hell’s fire otherwise. But she was cake comparatively.
“Marky” gained 60lbs by the end of mid-terms. Despite this, she still managed to bring back and have sex with local raver-gangsters three times each week. These guys pissed all over the bathroom, but I can’t fully blame its rankness on Marky’s playmates. When she took out her synthetic hair extensions she left them to dry and shed everywhere. Her body was so filthy that a week after I scrubbed the shower it was completely black with dirt and hair dye. When she was on her period, blood spatters regularly covered the floor, toilet, shower, and sink. She only cooked tacos and empanadas, and insisted she would win over a rich husband with this skill. I’m vegetarian, but she insisted that chicken wasn’t meat and tried to slip some into my salad.
After months of compromise, the last straw came when she threw a Wednesday morning party at 4 a.m. I rang our R.A. and she was asked to leave the dorms. It didn’t really matter, though, because she failed academic probation and dropped out for next semester.
those people sound reasonably bad, but it takes away from it that you criticise their eating habits and appearance which is none of your business…i had a housemate who would only buy products from sainsbury’s and only ate sainsbury value line tinned meatballs, curry sauce and oven chips but that didn’t make him a bad housemate (although i could have done without the diarrhoeic skidmarks he regularly left in the toilet as a result of this diet).
I agree with zomboid. “Marky” sounds like a bad enough roommate without mentioning the weight gain and acting like it was such a shock that men might want to have sex with a bigger girl. Gaining weight/being fat don’t make someone a terrible roommate, but loud sex, random parties, disgusting hygiene habits, and trying to trick you into eating foods you don’t eat do.
blood spatters = five stars on my book… seriously disturbing and i’m a girl! urgh…
I can see how OP is disgusted by those traits. When you are living with a roommate who is as bad as op’s, at one point you start to hate that person totally and some traits that are only annoying in other persons becomes unbearable. I mean that girl tried to convert it by hell threat and that can be very traumatic. The other girl who is gross enough to leave blood spatters I think I would hate her whole existence too. If she is got weird habit I’d be pretty sure to mention it when I mention her. It”s just human nature. I think if you are in situation you can’t be expected to put totally unbiased view. Of course onlookers would have unbiased view.
Hey ignore the first two comments, these were bad roomates. How did her ultra conservative views allow her to dye her hair purple?
Marky sounds like hell.
As I was reading this, I got spooked by the conservative girl dying her hair the same colour each time, that’s creepy and weird. And I thought it was bad until hearing she’s trying to convert the OP, and that the other girl- who brings gangsters to their living space- has monthly hygiene issues…! I really don’t know which is worse between those roomates.
I agree with oi, It would eventually get to that point where you hate everything they do, don’t do, and say, even if they said “hi!”
well, she said ‘raver gangster’, i assume that just means someone with stupid baggy clothes, not avon barksdale
lol Zomboid
thank’s for clearifying once again. I’m still learing American cultural references… (assuming this is American and if not then I’ll just accept my ignorance), but I’m a little relieved to learn real gangsters are not being brought into dorm rooms.
Thank you all for your comments!
Both Zomboid and NEJoy have valid points. I certainly could have left out a few details unrelated to intrusively bad habits, such as Marky’s weight gain. Next time I describe these people to someone I will be more sensitive about my description.
When it comes down to it, I’m just happy to finally be out of that situation, and in 300 words or less this was about the best attempt I could manage. I guess my frustration outweighed my sensitivity.
I have to agree that when you have a terrible roommate, you start to hate absolutely everything about them. I started to get angry about how much I hated my roommates HAIR at one point (not to her, but to a friend).
I commend you for compromising with these two. If it was me I’d be paranoid one girl would be plotting to murder and replace me while the other would annoy me to no end.
Marky definitely sounds like the worse of the two. Carrie sounds like she was just annoying (I’ve known girls like her, luckily I’ve never had to live with them), but Marky sounds like the kind of person you’d at first wish she’d just go away, and end up thinking of ways to dispose of her without getting caught.
My crappy former roommate would sing along to her favourite songs…if she was someone else who I liked, I probably wouldn’t even notice, but because it was her, I was like “STFU YOU DAVE MATTHEWS LOVING TONE DEAF CRETIN.”
In my mind, of course. Yay passive-aggression!